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Saturday, 30 January 2010

My voice, isnt what you hear.

Have you ever heard your own voice in a tape recorder? It sounds quite different when you play it back.
I mean everyone hears their own voice in their head, and it sounds bearable. But when played back, i swear i sound like the most annoying guy on earth.

How do people stand me?

More amusingly, i just got in-ear earphones. Those things block out.. everything. I cant even hear my own voice. So i end up saying things i cant hear, and hearing things that aren’t there! O.O

Tuesday, 26 January 2010

Kiss my ego :)

Shanice wrote me a blog post few days ago, about.. my ego. found it interesting.

Ego.
Its a curious thing, but everytime someone feeds it it gets weaker. No i get weaker. Not feeding it only makes it stronger more willing and able to prove to others that it is better; i am better. Guys are supposed to have it, girls are supposed to accept it. None of it makes you a wuss, too much of it makes you an asshole but just enough makes you charismatic. So where exactly do you draw the line to make it just enough? Oh, the complexity of my beloved ego. - in the person of elliott tan

Monday, 25 January 2010

The element of self realisation.

You know how mom always tells you something, but it goes in one ear and straight out the other. I mean, her face looks dead serious, but the words drown out as you turn up the volume on your ipod.

Truth is, what she's saying is most definitely true and there is much wisdom behind it. Yet despite it's importance, we still treat it as nagging.

Why?

Its not due to lack of importance, but due to the lack of a certain element.

Self realisation is one of the most powerful tools in getting a person to learn something.

"maybe you shouldnt play with monkeys"
"yeah whatever"
*taunts monkey with bannana*
*monkey bites your ear off*
"AHH! theres so much blood!"

"maybe i shouldnt play with monkeys."

Unfortunately, or fortunately, self realisation is not easily exploitable. You know how teachers insist on you doing the question instead of just giving the example answer. (we hate this because obviously we are lazy pigs who'd rather just follow examples on the board than just think for ourselves.)

They are trying to exploit the self realisation aspect. Unfortunately, it mostly backfires, and we get mostly frustrated.

Most ironic, how a most powerful tool of influence, thinking and learning is controlled by none other the individual himself.

Saturday, 23 January 2010

Emotions. Compartmentalise. Rationalise.

Emotions have gotten me into a quite a bit of trouble lately. Usually, i am a nice rational person. But when emotions drive actions, actions have unwanted consequences.

I still get emotions sometimes, but now, i compartmentalize, and do not act on them as rashly as i have been doing. I choose not to act on it, on think or dwell too long on it.

One of my biggest flaws is i tend to think too much. I overpredict, i think someone hates me when in truth they dont even care if they do or not. If i think i've made someone mad, the guilt factor begins to kick in, haunting me for the rest of the day. Screws up the mind.

It helps me to be a peaceful chap, but brooding over such small matters is really unhealthy.

Instead, i compartmentalize then rationalise. Screw what i could have done. Thats done, its over. Live in the present. I admit i am wrong, get up and carry on.

This doesnt make me emotionless, it just allows me to make more informed, thought through descisions. Maybe sometime, i can find a time to sit down (i predict at a beach) and just look back and recall. But for now, i live in the present.

So far, emotions. compartmentalise. rationalise.

its been working..
Adrenaline reduces pain.

Something i've noticed that is rather interesting. Outside of training, i am a sensitive soul. Smal cuts and irritation tend to be very bothersome to me. I reason that i should "man up" or "grow some nuts"

But, at rugby training (in the midst of brutal tackles, painful falls, bruises, scratches, contusions, abrasions, concussions and other painful sounding -uns.) The pain is brief, but it subsides quickly.

It was something that hung at the back of my mind for a while, but had not connected. The link between adrenaline and pain, had not registered yet. The rush of chemicals through the body. Perhaps this is what makes sportsmen appear so physically tough.

I get questions about rugby sometimes. "isnt it painful? the tackles and everything.." My reply confuses even me. I dont actually feel the pain. Its not as bad as it looks. I was looking back at a photo of me tackling someone, my face is all scrunched up, looks like im in alot of pain. I try to think back to that time, and realise, i couldnt even feel it.

Its a little disturbing, totally cool.